Are you settling or living?



I'm in a moment where loss and hardships have given me courage to write these words and spread this message that I think is so real and raw. It's my own personal pep talk.


Loss, devastation, heartbreak, disease comes and smacks you in the face, you have a few choices on how to handle it, none of them right or wrong, all of them exactly as they are meant to be, feel the emotions, let it go, give it to god, and then heal. They have an incredible way of awakening you, they smack the hell out of you and try to tell you to wake the f up, this is your life, are you happy, are you living it, or are you just existing. They make you realize what really matters, love, and what doesn’t, your new car. They open you up to want YOU to have more joy, more happiness, more truth, more beauty, more bravery and more courage, to live exactly how you WANT to.


You honor the ones that are gone too soon by LIVING, actually pushing away the excuses and stories you tell yourself on why you cant, or why you're in this dilemma, and start getting out of your own way. You take full responsibility for it all and realize that we can make changes and live better when we are WILLING. Don't ever settle on how you think you "should" be, be YOU fully and own that sh*t.



👉🏻Are you settling? If you were given an end date, (so morbid I know, but it opens your eyes) what would you do different with the time you had? 🤔


Every disaster, every ugly encounter, every hardship is to wake you up. Theres no other way of saying this, these moments allow you to take a step back, take yourself out of the game to break the old unwanted beliefs and patterns, figure out how to take full responsibility (it's not an overnight figureoutable thing) and then focus on YOU.


You will lose contact with some, you will create magical new relationships that appear at the perfect time, quotes, songs, people will speak to you, you will learn to forgive the past, you will take action to make the phone calls you’ve been putting off, you will set the date with the person who you’ve been meaning too, you will start to live more.


And then you will say no, unapologetically. You will say no when you don’t want to leave the house, you will say no when the distant relatives invite comes and you're not feeling it (always send a gift 😉), you will say no when you want to, unapologetically. You have a choice to choose your freedom, and saying no is mandatory if you want freedom. (No hard feelings it's the truth, we all have regretted saying yes when we knew deep down we should have and could have said no, preach!)


Get the things done that are so close in reach that you really have no reason to not be doing them. Start to plan for the things that need planning and excite you, like vacations and bucket list things.


Surround yourself physically and electronically (texting, social media) with the tribe of people that life you up, that don't judge you, that make you feel light, that truly love you for you without trying to change YOU, those are your people.


Life is a blessing, we don’t know our fate, so live, stop playing small, stop trying to fix what's not working anymore, stop making the excuses and stories, (well you won't stop fully doing that but you'll become more aware of them, i have a list of excuses and stories, and most I'm aware of and the others are a work in progress.) The point is execute what you love and want, try to live without regret, start to spread your wings and love with all you have, and that includes yourself!


As life moves along and I witness loss, heartache, disease, mother natures devastation, I live a little more. I thank God way more than I did the day before. (so ridiculous I should be thanking him like that all the time, but this is real talk.) I say I love you more to myself, to my family, to my friends.



That's the funny thing about hardships, they make you more aware, to BE more.



👉🏻Awareness comes out of the darkness.👈🏻



My message is always clear, I talk about the trust I have in the universe, all the faith I put into my higher power of God, how I’ve found ways to calm my mind and heart, how I’ve learned to truly forgive, how I try to live most days as present as possible, and other days I second guess more than I should, I'm a work in progress, aren't we all.


And then I ask myself,


"Ten years from now make sure you can say that you chose your life, you didn't settle on it."



I so humbly remember to let go of the judgements, let go of the bullshit, release what feels ridiculously heavy and start embracing what feels light; laughter, joy, fun, love, forgiveness, trust, faith, letting go, surrender, prayer, whatever is your truth, find it and ride that wave.


🌟We have no idea the contract we signed on how long we'll be here on Mother Earth. What I know for sure is that every moment is awakening you to live your fullest potential, even the darkest times that we may never understand the why, crack us open. And at some point when the healing occurs you start to serve and help others find their light through your experiences, it's not happening to you it's happening for your highest good, to be more love.🌟



You are a warrior, embrace the love, ride the waves and don't ever settle on your life. You are capable you just need to be willing to take the action.


Much much love and light,




Don't forget to follow me on Instagram @stacyjread, follow the love and keep the faith!